Paul has spoken in general terms in the first chapter but is now going to apply these teachings to the Ephesians. Mercy and grace are not being used interchangeably but rather as part of a package. The best way to distinguish these is to repeat the old adage: Mercy is when we don’t get what we deserve and grace is when we receive what we don’t deserve.
As to love, God didn’t wake up one morning and decide to save us as His saving plan was in place before the beginning of the world. There is nothing we can do to make God love us because he has already decided to do so nor can we be separated from this love. That said, we get into trouble if we think this is God’s only attribute. The modern church has tended to limit its conception of God to just love – something akin to a doting grandfather. But God is more than that as He is also also just, righteous and holy.
Exodus 34:5 The Lord descended in the cloud and stood with him there and proclaimed the Lord by name. 6 The Lord passed by before him and proclaimed: “The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, and abounding in loyal love and faithfulness, 7 keeping loyal love for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin. But he by no means leaves the guilty unpunished, responding to the transgression of fathers by dealing with children and children’s children, to the third and fourth generation.” NET
The text starts off well enough because it assures us of the grace of God. The love described is the love of a mother for her child – a love that will not let go. (We might get a different understanding if we consider wrath from this perspective of a loving parent). What is certain is that God will do what He says He will do. He is a God of mercy and of righteousness who will forgive us but He is not a pushover. Ephesians is the same concept as these verses from Exodus.
Ephesians 2:6 And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with Him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, 7 in order that in the coming ages He might display the surpassing riches of His grace, demonstrated by His kindness to us in Christ Jesus. BSB
If you go back to Ephesians 1 it talks about Jesus and the blessings and benefits that flow to us through Him as a result of hearing and believing the gospel. Here Paul is telling us that everything God did for Christ, He is now doing for us (again, even though we don’t deserve it) as we are regenerated (raised up) and are seated with Christ in the heavenly places. Our actual experience of this won’t happen until we die or the Second Coming (depending upon your viewpoint) but Paul wants us to know that we are already seated so even if we haven’t experienced it yet, it will happen. While our current experience may seem to fall short of this, in God’s time-frame, these have already been accomplished.
Isaiah 55:11 so shall my word be that goes forth out of my mouth: it shall not return to me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing I sent it to do. NHEB
In the meantime, these verses from Ephesians could point toward the sacramental experience we have through prayer and communion. John Calvin’s idea of communion was that we ascend into Heaven when we partake of communion. In other words, Jesus doesn’t come to us, we go to Him. (While the Holy Spirit can be anywhere, Christ cannot because He has a body). Paul could also be speaking in mystical sense in that these two worlds that we talk about aren’t really all that far apart.
The Greek word the New Testament uses for kindness (chrestos) only shows up in the New Testament. It is taken from the word for Christ with only one letter different than the word for Christ (Christos). Paul and the early church invented this word as he wants us to be sure and understand that we deserve wrath but have received mercy instead (and also that we understand the source of that grace). When people think of Christianity, they should associate it with what God has done for us through Christ and think of how kind He must be. They look at Christ and can note how powerful God is.